We have read your manuscript with boundless delight.
If we were to publish your paper, it would be impossible for us to publish any work of lower standard.
And as it is unthinkable that in the next thousand years we shall see its equal, we are, to our regret, compelled to return your divine composition, and to beg you a thousand times to overlook our short sight and timidity.
Rejection slip from a Chinese Economic Journal

Submitting to Meandering Press
While we have a deep and abiding empathy for all aspiring authors, Meandering Press is small enough that we simply can not take on unsolicited projects at this time. Simply put, don't waste your time, energy, and postage sending us stuff that we haven't asked for, because it will be instantly recycled by cranky people.
If you are looking for a publisher, check out the variety of sites on the web about finding publishers and buy yourself a copy of The Writer's Market. Or consider publishing your own work. Good luck!
A Big Exception
Have you completed a master's thesis or doctoral dissertation? Did you find some inspired way to cope with the vicissitudes of the process? Meandering Press is looking for short anecdotes and longer essays exploring the despair and delights of writing big papers.
For more information, go here.